Drippings of Grace: ~ When You Find a Piece of Yourself

It had been twelve years since she had held my son, and now she was coming to meet him. I was a jumble of emotions. What if she didn't remember my son? How would she handle this important moment in his life - this connection to his past? Would she be gentle with his heart? What if she wasn't the one in the photographs he had kept in his room all these years?

We arrived at the restaurant. She wasn't the foster mom in his photos. She was the first to hold him, the first to care for him. He sat quietly next to her. I asked him if he wanted dinner. He said he wasn't hungry. I think he understood the significance of this moment. She noticed his empty plate, and in her own language, expressed concern. I didn't understand her words, but I understood her mother's heart. I explained, through the interpreter, he had been in the car for five hours, and we'd had a late lunch. She smiled.

I gave her the letter I had written. Twelve years of gratefulness poured out. She looked surprised and relieved that the words were in her language. And so she read my heart.

Twelve years ago, we received word that our child was coming to the United States. We were very happy. He was our first child, and we named him Josiah. After we received his picture, it was very hard waiting for him to arrive. I knew my son had been born, but I could not hold him or care for him.

The day his plane came, we were very excited. He was a gift from God. It was a joy to finally hold him and take care of him. When we saw the photographs of him while he was in Korea, it was such a blessing to see that he had been loved and cared for by you and your family. That is very important to me, as his mom, to know that he had a good start in life.

We always felt that it was very important for Josiah to remember the people in the photographs from his birth country. He keeps a frame in his room with those pictures, and we have always referred to you as "Eomma" because he needed a name for the special person who held him and took care of him for his first four months.

We have chosen to teach Josiah to respect all the moms in his life. We have always told him he has three mommies: a birth mommy who carried him, a foster mommy who cared for him when we couldn’t, and a forever mommy who has covenanted to love him for his whole life.

Over these twelve years, we have prayed for you and your family, and we have hoped that one day we would meet. Today, we are so pleased to honor the role you played in Josiah’s life. We are so happy that someone whom he has only known in a photo becomes real to him today. Please accept this small gift as a symbol of our gratefulness for all you have meant to Josiah and to our family.

We will always remember you and cherish these few brief moments when God allowed our paths to cross.

When she finished reading my words, she held the paper to her chest and said, "I will always treasure this."

He was anxious to give her his gift, but he wanted me to explain. I told her it was the same necklace his father gave me when we found out he was coming twelve years ago. We wanted her to have one - to thank her for caring for him, to thank her for being a mother to him, for being a mother to so many children, 139 children in all.

We talked. We asked questions. We took photos. The night ended, and we drove five hours back home. Ten hours in the car for a brief two hour meeting. I was nervous he wouldn't think it had been worth it. She wasn't the one in his photos, and I was afraid he was disappointed. He had been so quiet.

On the way home, he said, "That was interesting. She took care of me." I knew he understood. It wasn't about her remembering him or being the one in the photo. It was about making a connection and saying thank you.

When we finally arrived home, I pulled out the photos from his young life in Korea. Most of them were of his second foster mom and her family. He had his 100th day celebration with her, and she had taken tons of photos. But then I saw them, two little photos.