"... we are always harking back to some occasion which seemed to us to reach perfection, setting that up as a norm, and depreciating all other occasions by comparison. But these other occasions, I now suspect, are often full of their own new blessing, if only we would lay ourselves open to it. " (C. S. Lewis)



Monday, November 30, 2009

What's the deal with hats?

At some point in the last three months, my baby boy disappeared and a new creature moved into our home. He still resembles my oldest child, but somehow, he's all new.

It all started with Halloween. First, he wanted to dress up like Slash from the group Guns and Roses. I must take a moment to explain that I do not let my 11-year-old listen to Guns and Roses (nor do I recommend that any 11-year-old listen to them). Thanks to Guitar Hero (with the volume turned down or with it set to guitar only), he has been exposed to the incredible guitar skills of Slash and wanted to be him for Halloween. When I googled Slash and showed him a picture of the real man, I asked him if this was the person he wanted to emulate. He responded by saying, "Well, I don't really want to be like him. I just want to dress like a rock star, but I do want his hat." I'll spare you the photo of the rock star, but here's the hat he wanted.




He apparently recognized the error of his ways. Sometimes the same sweet little boy still shows up. So, always trying to please, I scoured every Goodwill store in the state (slight exageration) and came up with leather boots, faux leather pants, and a leather vest. I even found a silk animal print shirt befitting any rock star. Who knew Goodwill would render such treasures. However, I knew that even with all the great finds, he would not be content until we found the hat. The best I could do in my search was a red, white and blue sparkly Uncle Sam hat. You better believe I snatched it up. I don't often get to be my son's hero. He usually reserves that spot for his dad!(Which is how it should be!) But I knew how much he wanted to be a rock star and that this would probably be his last year to dress up, and I was not going home without a hat. Apparently, my son has vision because after his initial frown at a red, white and blue sparkly monstrosity, he came around to my plan. To make a long story short, a can of black spray paint and a 6 dollar girl's belt from Goodwill later, he got his hat. He was thrilled and for one brief moment, I got to be the hero. (I'll add the photo later.)

After all that, do you think I even got to see my son dress up? The one year I was excited about his costume, he decided to trick or treat with friends in a different town.

(Here's a photo of my loyal children. They had a blast with their cousins Emily and Christopher. No picture of Siah yet.)

That was just the beginning of Siah's transformation. Since then, he's been obsessed with hats, at least one hat in particular. His red winter hat says "Fender" on the front. When I told him Fender was the name of some of the best guitars ever made, he decided to make it a regular part of his wardrobe.


And speaking of wardrobe, since when are tidy whities all wrong. Obviously I am behind the times. I just didn't know that when you get in sixth grade you have to change the style of underwear you wear. Now all he wants to wear is boxers. (I'll spare you that photo as well.)

There have been other changes. Some bad. Some good. For instance, he is bored with video games. I asked him, "Who are you, and what have you done with my son?" This can't be (although, I'm thrilled)! How can you be obsessed one day and totally bored the next? To encourage his new love of the outdoors, his dad let him buy a new air gun. Now he's obsessed with squirrels and hunting. We are so not hunting people, at least I'm not. I am definitely not ready for all this change.

Oh, and did I mention the new obsession with money. (Actually, it's not new at all. He's always had an affection for cold hard cash.) He recently went door to door by himself selling coffee for his youth group. He was like a madman running from house to house. He did great. And now that he's older, his dad has encouraged him to "go earn money in the neighborhood". What? He's my baby! That means I can't watch him every second. (Notice how it's his dad pushing him out of the nest! I'm not real happy with him about that.) On his first attempt, he raked yards and came home with $8. He was high as a kite. As much as this new independence scares me, I do love that he's learning the value of hard work.

My son's growing up. I must face the facts. I've never thought about him as a teenager other than knowing what qualities I want to instill in him. This past weekend, we had some friends stop by on their way to dinner. Two of them were friends of our foreign exchange student, Je, several years ago, and they still keep in touch.



Seeing these young men again reminded me that boys grow up. They just do. These boys are fine young men. It made me wonder what my son will be like in five years. I do believe, despite how terrified I am at all these changes, that he is on his way to becoming a fine young man as well. He works at his grades, he is a great big brother, he has a tender heart, he is sensitive to God's leading, he is learning to be a better friend, blah, blah, blah. I could go on. I won't! Interestingly, the changes I see are mostly outward changes. He really is still the same sweet boy he's always been.



Thank you, God, for allowing me to witness this transformation from boy to teen and for helping me navigate these unfamiliar waters. I know You love him more than I ever could, and I rest in the promise that You will finish the work you've already begun in him. Help me help him along the way.

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